娴情记语 VII

It has been 6 months since the breakup.
Well, yes, she didn't block me on Telegram but she also hasn't texted me back either.
Nonetheless, I have decided to wait until June 2024 and I intend to follow through.
C said that she is stubborn, but she didn't know that I can stubborn too~ =p
So... why am I still waiting?

人生没有重来，有时候一旦错过了就回不去了。
We only live once and there is no repeat. Sometimes when you miss each other, it's for life and there might be no going back.
While that might be true, how am I so sure that she is the one?

I think this is something I have discussed before.
I will never know with 100% certainty that she is the one, at least not now. However, she has exhibited many many signs that I would be happy spending the rest of my life with her. Her devotion to the people she love (be it family or friends), the strong emotional connection we have, the intellectual discussions we have, her strong sense of responsibility, her willingness to have tough conversations & her willingness to work through things in a relationship.

The other thing is about knowing what you want, and C has certainly attained and gone beyond the basic benchmark of what I want in a partner. Shan't elaborate further since my previous post below has already explained in detail.

 In essence, I am choosing to wait so that I can 给自己一个交代。Regardless of what happens, come June next year, I can safely tell myself that I have really tried my best and there is no regret.

 

娴情记语 VI

An unexpected thought popped into my head.

As time passes, aren't your feelings for someone supposed to fade & dilute?

Strangely, as time goes by, the more I feel that she is "the one".

Of course, I think I mentioned before, that imo there isn't just a solo "the one". There are many people who can potentially be "the one". You can possibly get together (get married) with any of these "the ones" and still live a (largely) happy & fulfilling life! So what do I mean that C is "the one"?

After all the girls I have met, both before and after the breakup, C still remains at the top of "the ones"; there was no change to her position ever since I met & dated her. Sounds pretty vague? Then let me get into the details.

Other than emotional connection and intellectual engagement (and on both counts, C shared one of the deepest ones with me), cliche as it may sound, it's the lifestyle, beliefs and values. I don't dare to say that we are perfectly aligned since we only dated for 3 months and I don't think I know her super super well yet, but based on what I had observed for the 3 months, these are highly aligned!

To give a few examples, both of us pursue a minimalist lifestyle. We go for practicality instead of brand and try to bring as little as possible when we go out. Both of us place our family in first place, and work as a close second. Both of us are highly responsible, occasionally (actually should be frequently =p) skipping lunch for work, and always ensuring that any task given to us will be completed and of a high/reasonable quality. Both of us are also fiercely loyal friends and highly dependable. And finally and most importantly, both of us believe that "Soulmates are made, not born". In other words, we have communicated to each other that we are not expecting someone who is a perfect match to just appear in our lives, but rather, prepared to work hard to maintain the relationship and work hard to sustain the relationship and not take it as a given.

And so, the more girls I interact with (I don't mean dating events since I haven't attended any since March 2023), the more her attributes seem to stand out, and it just merely affirms my gut feel: that she might just be the right one. (This is a gut feel that I had after I met her on 11 March, even though I don't really know her as well as I do now. )

Haha, can't believe it's Dec already! Going to be 6 months since the breakup soon. Well, since she hasn't blocked me on our last channel, shall continue waiting.