娴情记语 IV

Was reading about the divorce procedures in Singapore.

I think I can empathise much better with what C is going through if my guess is correct, especially if she is super close to her sister and involved in the whole process with her sister.

From what I understand, seems like there are 2 routes to apply for divorce:

1. Divorce by proving adultery

2. Unreasonable behavior

Regardless of which route is chosen, divorce is a lengthy and emotionally draining process.

In the best case scenario, as long as both parties will not contest the divorce and have come to a consensus on ancillary matters, the divorce in Singapore can take as little as four months.

Of course, this is the ideal state. 6 months is probably a more realistic timeline. That means we are looking at Nov/Dec.
And all these is assuming the divorce is uncontested.

From what I know of the situation, the wife and child is all that he has, so if he loses both, he has almost nothing left.
And I am guessing the incident which happened on 11 June might also be related to him trying to contest the divorce, so there is a good likelihood that we are looking at the normal track here.

In which case, this applies...
A divorce on the normal track typically takes approximately 3 to 4 months for the Interim Judgment of Divorce to be granted, depending on the nature of the dispute and complexity, and another 3 to 8 months after that for all ancillary matters (i.e. children issues, maintenance, and the division of matrimonial assets) to be resolved. The application for the Certificate of Final Judgment is usually made after the conclusion of the ancillary matters. In some cases, divorces on the normal track may even stretch past 18 months. 😲

Assuming everything goes well, we are looking at the Dec period. If not, we are looking at May / June next year!

To summarise, we have no way to know for sure when the divorce will be finalised, there is so much uncertainty!
If I were to put myself in her shoes, I can't even put a timeline to when this matter will conclude, and when I will feel fine enough to start dating again. Considering this, it's no wonder she opted for a clean break rather than ask for time off. It's the only way to be fair to me, and herself.

Now, doing all these research about the proceeding and procedure has allowed me to better understand what she was and is still going through. And we still haven't included the parts about going down to the lawyer's office with her sister to discuss the case (which can be traumatic), constantly looking out for and consoling her sister about this, and... how this might impact her belief in "man"kind. That is a lot to follow up on and follow through.

It's not just a lot of work but an emotional roller coaster. It's a huge load on her mental / emotional capacity.

If I were her, I also wouldn't be in the mood to date anyone. Dating is probably the last thing on my mind until this issue gets settled.